The quitting smoking thing is not going well. Mostly because I’m still smoking. Though I did cut down - I only had four cigarettes yesterday as opposed to the fifteen or so I was averaging - that’s still not quitting so I’m still a smoker just not as much as a smoker. I swear I am not buying another pack when this one is done. For now, still a smoker. A guilt ridden smoker.
I applied for another position in my office. It’s the same position I held for the first seven years I worked at this job and it still currently my title. I like what I do now but there’s a burn out factor with working with the public and I think I’ve reached it. I don’t think I’m going to get the position but I feel like I’ve made a statement to my boss by applying for it. We’ll see.
We’re having a taco festival at my parents’ house today. I really enjoy going over there for dinner and morose as it may sound, I’m enjoying it more as my parents are getting older. Savoring my time with them and all. I have such a great family and I’m forever thankful for that.
Still getting used to having Todd on tumblr. Glad you guys are enjoying his unique style of humor or whatnot. He makes me laugh all day long and I like that he gets to spread that laughter. That he’s kept his sense of humor through this bout of unemployment says a lot about him and what’s he’s made of.
I’m all about the appreciation of friends and family today. That will happen when someone you know dies. I feel bad for Natalie because her ex passed away without them ever reconciling whatever bad feelings were between them. I’d go on a tangent about making amends with people before it’s too late but I know that realistically, sometimes amends can not be made. So just appreciate the people you do have a good relationship with. Tell them you’re glad they’re in your life.
Too serious for Saturday. Let’s go out there and have some fun today. Come on over for some tacos. My parents won’t mind. Much.
Got up at 4:45 today to start cleaning my house because Nicky and Aaron are coming over today to hang out with me and Todd and Lisa and Giselle and Natalie and the dogs!
Last night (and Saturday night) Todd and I hung out in the backyard with Lisa and Matt for hours. We talked about all kinds of things but mostly about songs that get stuck in our head, albums we listen to all the way through, favorite shows we’ve seen, worst shows, songs we don’t like by bands we love and the crazy shit we did in our youth. It was a lovely night(s). We looked for meteors (but didn’t see any) and played with our cameras and drank beer and just talked.
I still can’t write a damn thing. Still having this existential crisis. But taking time out from that anxiety to just relax and enjoy life is something I need to do more often.